


Inland

by xpaperheartso



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Buck has trauma, Christopher is an angel, Dad!Buck, Found Family, Gen, Idiots in Love, Light Angst, M/M, Mostly Fluff, None of that street fighting/lawsuit shit here, This is before 3x04, cute af, tagging is hard
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-05
Updated: 2019-11-18
Packaged: 2021-01-23 19:49:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21325696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xpaperheartso/pseuds/xpaperheartso
Summary: “Maybe try going to the zoo this time, something inland.”Or,Buck and Christopher spend the day at the zoo and Eddie totally doesn't smile like a love-sick idiot with each text.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 51
Kudos: 327
Collections: The Buddie Brigade





	1. Chopped Liver

**Author's Note:**

> So this idea has been in my head since 3x03 and I'm so glad I can finally share it with you all! I fell in love with Buddie in season 2 but I haven't started reading fanfiction for them until season 3 and I couldn't help but join in the fun since season 3 has just been chock full of Buddie content. 
> 
> As mentioned in the tags, this fic is mostly cute and fluffy but there will be some very light angst - mainly Buck edging into a panic attack and having flashbacks of the tsunami. This takes place about a week after the end scene of 3x03 so Buck has yet to go into light duty yet. 
> 
> Enjoy!

_ “Maybe try going to the zoo this time, something inland.” _

Eddie’s words had been drifting around Buck’s mind since that unexpected visit last week, popping up whenever he was trying to plan his next day with Chris. Despite Eddie’s heartfelt trust, Buck had still been anxious to take Chris anywhere outside his apartment - opting to either have food delivered (thank you GrubHub) or cook it himself, spending most of the day watching Chris’s favorite movies, building misshapen leggo...somethings - and pretty much anything the kid wanted to do that involved staying indoors. Chris didn’t seem to mind, he was just happy to spend any time he could with _ his Buck _\- a title that still melted Buck’s heart no matter how many times he heard it. 

When it came time for Eddie to pick up Chris, he always asked about their day - glancing at Buck each time it became clear that they had once again not left the apartment, to which Buck would look away and turn his attention to hugging Christopher goodbye one more time. Thankfully, Eddie never said anything, but Buck knew that sooner or later he had to go outside again - with Christopher in tow - because life was continuing to roll along at its usual pace regardless of the trauma left in the tsunami’s wake. 

It was a Tuesday night when Buck made the decision that tomorrow would be the day. He’d checked the Los Angeles Zoo website before crawling into bed, adding the times of the animal feeding events and shows into his phone for reference. He made a mental checklist of everything he’d need to pack - sunscreen (he couldn’t do much against a fucking tsunami but at least he could fight the goddamn sun), snacks, water bottle, coloring book and crayons for the drive over.

Buck finished his mental list before checking his phone was plugged in, setting an early alarm and settling under his comforter as an excited smile crept onto his face. 

-

Warm sunlight bathed his apartment with an early morning glow, reflecting off any shiny surface it could find and adding an almost cartoon-like sparkle to the place. If anything, it only mirrored Buck’s upbeat mood as he double-checked the supplies he’d gathered - coloring books and crayons included. He’d taken the liberty of buying an extra set to keep at his place, and though Buck would never admit it - not even to Maddie - he also has his own coloring book complete with pages featuring first responders. Buck would also deny that the firefighters were colored to resemble his teammates and the cops looked suspiciously like Athena, with Maddie and Christopher added in whenever possible. 

Satisfied he hadn’t forgotten anything, Buck checked the time on his phone - was he counting down the seconds until Eddie and Chris got there? Maybe. Would he stop? Nope.

**[Eddie] 8:35 am** : _ ETA 10 minutes. Btw Chris is very excited :) _

The text was already two seconds old, but it felt more like a month old as he began to pace - a habit he’d tried and failed (miserably) to break. Buck stopped suddenly to glance at the hand-made card displayed proudly on his refrigerator. That night at his (subsequently failed) “welcome back” party, Buck had nearly melted onto the patio as Chris handed him the card. The love, adoration and innocent _ sincerity _he’d seen in that kid’s eyes gripping his heart and only confirming his boundless love for his best friend’s kid. 

**[Me] 8:37 am: ** _ Aight sounds good. Tell Chris I’m super excited too! _

He resumed his pacing as he casually thumbed from his messaging app to check the weather, even though he’d checked last night and right after he’d woken up. Today was looking like a tastefully warm and sunny day, followed by a few clouds in the evening with a low of 80 degrees. Buck narrowed his eyes, catching the _ “10% chance of rain” _ warning in the bottom left corner. Should he bring an umbrella just in case? Ten percent was pretty low, maybe just a poncho?

A knock interrupted his mini-crisis over the weather, replacing concern with overt happiness that spread from his chest to his toes. 

Two quick strides to the door and he was opening it, smile brightening at the sight of Eddie and Christopher - the latter flashing his perfect 8-yr old smile and already moving in for a hug.

“Morning Buck!” Chris practically cheered. Buck crouched to return the hug and flashed a bright smile of his own. “Good morning to you too buddy.”

Eddie hadn’t said anything yet, but he shifted into an almost affronted position with one hand on his hip. “What am I chopped liver?” He huffed playfully. Chris giggled and said something about liver being gross - which only made it harder for Eddie to maintain his mock frown. 

Buck chuckled as he stood, head tilting slightly as he met Eddie’s gaze. “Lucky for you I like chopped liver,” he answered smoothly.

_ Nice one bonehead. _

While he internally berated himself for being both cheesy and saying stupid (if not true in more than one capacity) shit like that, Eddie’s face shifted to something more...flustered? Buck swore his best friend’s cheeks seemed a tad more flushed than necessary, and his eyes held a certain shimmer he couldn’t identify.

But damn if Eddie didn’t look good with whatever that look was on his face.

Another beat passed before Eddie was able to respond, right hand shifting the backpack on his shoulder as he stepped forward, Buck taking his own step backward to allow the other man through the door. Buck _ definitely _ didn’t savor the light scent of cologne that lingered after Eddie had passed him, and his pulse _ definitely _didn’t hike up a notch as his friend’s figure became almost perfectly highlighted by the sunlight beaming through his huge windows. 

The soft tapping of crutches snapped Buck out of his stupor, effectively shifting the look of pure awe on his face to one of amusement. The kid had already made his way to the couch and was watching a cartoon - Wonderpets or something like that. Buck’s gaze turned soft as he watched him, looking away only after Eddie commented on his supplies spread all over the island counter. 

“Interesting spread - you going somewhere?” Eddie couldn’t help sounding a bit hopeful at the idea - Buck had yet to leave the apartment with Chris since the tsunami, and Eddie understood his friends’ hesitation. If the roles had been reversed he might’ve done something similar. 

“Well actually I was uh, thinking maybe me and Chris could take a little field trip today.” Buck tried not to make it sound like a question for permission, but the look he gave Eddie pretty much did that for him anyway. Eddie’s eyebrows rose, his lips curling up at the corners. “What did you have in mind?” 

Buck released an internal sigh of relief - Eddie didn’t seem bothered by the idea of him taking Chris out, which made sense of course because it wasn’t Eddie who had been keeping them indoors over the past week. He couldn’t help the fear that constantly crept into his heart whenever he thought of being outside with Chris - still couldn’t shake the nightmares that left him gasping for air, drenched in sweat with Christopher’s name on his lips. Talking to Maddie helped, and texting Eddie to check on Christopher usually helped temporarily settle his nerves. This trip still had Buck worried, even if it was a good suggestion from the kid’s father himself - which reassured Buck whenever he started to doubt the idea.

It was too late to back out now, so he shoved the fear and anxiety into a box and kicked it deep into his subconscious.

“The zoo. Turns out they’ve got animal feedings _ and _ a petting zoo.” Buck couldn’t help the excited smile on his face as he lowered his voice, “I also heard they have penguins.” 

Eddie was silent for a beat before a giant grin bloomed on his face, eyes crinkling in the way that left Buck weak in the knees. “Something inland huh? Good choice.” The other man cocked an eyebrow, “where’d you come up with that?” His smile was now a smirk, arms crossed over his chest as Buck rolled his eyes and got closer. “A friend,” he answered simply - as if he totally didn’t want to pull Eddie close in a more-than-friends kind of way. 

Eddie shook his head before setting Chris’s backpack on the counter. It still looked brand new, no signs of a certain ketchup stain, no NASA pin over the bottom pocket - even the color was off. It was a lighter navy blue than the old one, lost to the waves at the pier like the bodies Buck had been too late to save. The images flashed briefly across his mind, faces hidden by water, arms limp and outstretched - reaching for help that never came.

_ Not now please not now. _

He took a deep breath, focusing on the voices from the tv and Christopher’s laughter, latching onto the presence of two of the most important people in his life. He had to look okay, had to look _ in control _ so that Eddie still felt he could trust Chris with him.

So much for kicking his anxiety to the curb.

A warm weight rested on his shoulder, pulling Buck back to reality. Dark eyes met his, concern pulling at Eddie’s brow as he watched him. It was just like that day after the tsunami, when Eddie brought Chris over to hang out with _ his Buck _\- as if the events of the previous day had never happened. Buck stifled a gasp when he registered Eddie’s thumb resting where his neck and collarbone met.

“Buck?”

A shaky exhale. “Sorry.” He paused again, letting Eddie’s grip ground him. “I’m ok - just - just thinking too much.” He let out a shaky laugh, but Eddie still had that look on his face. 

“Hey, there’s nothing to apologize for okay? It’s trauma and it hits us all differently.” There was a flash of sadness in his eyes, gone so quickly but long enough Buck caught it. “I don’t care how many times I have to say it, but I trust you.” There was resolve in his voice, eyes glittering with a ferocity that held Buck’s gaze, daring him to object. “I trust you with my son’s life. More so than anyone else in this world - more so than his own blood.” 

Buck’s chest felt tight at the admission, the words echoing in his mind long after they’d already been spoken. He still felt like he’d failed them both during the tsunami - he’d lost Chris for god knows how many hours, was unable to bring him back to Eddie even though that had been his _ one fucking job _. The look on his best friends’ face when he broke the news that Chris was gone...he’d never forget it. He prayed to whatever deities were out there that he never had to see Eddie look that utterly devastated again.

“I trust you with my life too, and so does everyone else at the 118.”

His eyes twitched and he had to blink a few times to stave off the tears that threatened to rise at the mention of his team. His _ family _. He missed them, and he silently smacked himself for not visiting as much, for not accepting their help or invitations to lunches and dinners.

He was an idiot.

There was a gentle squeeze on his shoulder, and suddenly Buck’s hand was reaching to rest on Eddie’s shoulder. “Thank you,” he whispered after a minute. Eddie nodded. “Anytime.” 

He let Eddie pull him into a quick but firm hug, the fear and anxiety melting away, leaving his mind quiet and peaceful. Chris sang along to the tv in the background, Buck’s carefully crafted plans moving to the forefront of his mind once again. They both lingered after the hug, taking in the moment. 

Eddie’s phone dinged, and reality slid back into place.

“Okay so I made a list last night and I’m pretty sure I got everything…” Buck approached the island and gestured to the supplies. “It’s pretty sunny out and I know Chris tends to get burnt easily so I got sunscreen and extra water. I still have some of those gummy snacks, but I wasn’t sure if that’d be too much sugar - so I packed granola bars instead.”

Buck continued to give Eddie a breakdown of his plans, occasionally asking if he missed something or if Eddie could think of anything else. 

Eddie couldn’t help the adoring look on his face when he half-listened to him - his best friend who had taken the time to go against his anxiety and guilt in order to plan a trip to the zoo with his son. To write down each event and when it started, even downloaded a map of the zoo and circled the penguin exhibit because he knew they were Chris’s favorite. 

Evan Buckley would be the death of him.

“You did good Buck - good call on the sunscreen. I have two juice packs in his bag - he’ll probably want one with lunch.” Buck nodded and they arranged everything into the backpack, enjoying the simple sounds of the tv in the background. 

“Would you like to do the honors?” Eddie asked with a playful smile, zipping the bag closed before turning toward his son. Buck smirked in response, approaching the couch and crouching in front of Chris to grab his attention as Eddie muted the TV behind him. “Hey superman I’ve got a surprise for you,” Buck grinned.

Christopher’s eyes widened a little as he became fixated onto Buck, one hand playing with a crease on his jeans. “Yeah?” 

Buck nodded. “Yep! We’re going…” He paused for dramatic effect. Christopher looked ready to burst with excitement. “To the zoo!”

Christopher’s eyes lit up like stars as the biggest smile Buck had ever seen spread across his face. Buck could only mirror his smile as his insides slowly melted at the image of pure childish joy in front of him. 

“Do they have penguins?!” Chris nearly shouted, eyes darting from Buck to Eddie. Both men glanced at each other, sharing knowing looks. “We’ll have to find out, won’t we?” Apparently that was a good enough answer, and Buck stifled a laugh as Chris cheered, his body moving on its own as he slid his hands under Chris’ armpits and lifted him up into the air. 

Childish giggles filled the apartment as Buck spun Chris around, sunlight catching the both of them in such a picturesque angle that Eddie’s breath caught in his throat. He wanted time to stop so he could paint the scene in front of him, so he could mount it on his living room wall, look at it everyday, and be overwhelmed by the sense of _ home _the image exuded. 

—

“Alright kiddo - dads’ gotta go to work.” Eddie gave his son one last hug, planting a kiss on the crown of his head before standing. “Love you.”

“Love you dad.” 

Buck was tempted - oh so _ very _tempted - to tease about whether he deserved a goodbye kiss too, but he didn’t want to make things awkward so he bit his lip instead and pretended to check his Instagram. Not that he’d been posting much lately, considering all the crazy traumatic shit that seemed to keep happening. What’s a guy gotta do to catch a break? 

“Hey,” and Buck looked up to meet those beautiful eyes again, nearly getting lost in them before warmth bloomed from his left shoulder (again) - the hand resting comfortably as if it belonged there. Buck forced himself to not simply stare at the hand while his pulse quickened, flashing back to last week, and every detail of that moment - how the light accented Eddie’s best features, his cologne hanging lightly in the air between them - and his strong hand grounding Buck, the _ “There’s nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you” _speech that Buck played in his head at least once a day.

_ Fuck. _

“Thanks again for this.” Eddie’s eyes held so much sincerity, so much trust - and yeah, maybe Buck _ should _ stop feeling guilty about the tsunami, but he could barely form a coherent thought right now. As it was, he could only blink and meet Eddie’s gaze. “It means so much to Christopher.” 

A smile broke out on Buck’s face at the mention of the best kid in the world. It also granted him a brief reprieve from losing himself in Eddie’s gorgeous eyes. “It’s no problem man, you know I’d do anything for that kid.” The statement only brightened Eddie’s smile and Buck’s cheeks felt warmer than usual.

His friend squeezed his shoulder once before releasing it, finally breaking eye contact to grab his keys off the counter. Buck forced himself to move, following his friend to the door while willing his face to cool down. _ Get a grip dude. _

“Tell everyone I said hi - oh and do you mind telling Cap to call me when he can? I uh-” Buck rubbed the back of his neck, eyes shifting to the floor. “I just need to...to talk to him,” he finished lamely. He glanced up to a knowing look from Eddie, who nodded as he opened the door. “Sure thing Buck.”

There was a brief moment - so quick it was barely there - that Buck saw a flash of something...else in Eddie’s eyes. He shook off the thought - must have been a trick of the light. “See ya later Eddie.”

“You too Buck."


	2. Buckle Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eddie's pov + the firefam ft. a dash of Dad!Buck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to my girls @frazzled-bi and @godhatesjordan for supporting my shenanigans and beta-ing this chapter <3

Eddie didn’t allow himself to think about Buck until he’d made it to his car. He tapped his foot impatiently in the elevator, hands shoved into his jean pockets and eyes fixed pointedly on the double doors. He apologized when he nearly slammed into a tall woman waiting right outside the elevator, which was partially her fault Eddie reasoned - though he still offered her a (mostly) genuine apology before continuing outside. Keys in hand, he crossed the street and climbed inside his vehicle within the span of 30 seconds - though it was a blur for Eddie.

In the quiet he let go, resting back against the headrest as every Buck-related thought rushed forward like a flood. Closing his eyes only heightened the experience - Buck’s hair gel caught in his nose from the hug, a hint of laundry detergent mixing with the natural scent of just  _ Buck  _ (mahogany and flannel with something else Eddie couldn’t place). He took a deep breath and held it, hands gripping the steering wheel as he counted to five before exhaling slowly. He realized this was all ridiculous, that he shouldn’t be so overwhelmed by the mere sight - the  _ smell -  _ of his best friend. Friends don’t smell each other, no matter how close, and they  _ definitely _ don’t  _ savor _ it.

_ Get a grip Diaz _

Talking himself down from these... episodes (he wasn’t sure what to call them) had become commonplace in the last few months, growing more and more detailed and distracting as time went on. Eddie didn’t know what exactly brought these on, nor why he reacted so strongly every time. No, that was a lie. He knew they started with meeting Buck, and they had continued to grow in intensity as the two became closer. He also noticed the stronger episodes tended to occur whenever Buck was with Christopher. 

_ Deep breaths _

He kept his eyes closed and ignored the impulse to check the time. He wasn’t far from the station and he had to pull himself together before facing the rest of the team - they were observant bastards,  _ especially  _ when Buck and Eddie were involved. He only needed another minute or two anyway, the scent of  _ Buck  _ slowly giving way to car interior. 

_ “Lucky for you I like chopped liver.” _

Eddie inhaled sharply, hands moving to rub his face as his ears burned. He couldn’t shake the image of Buck’s smile as he’d spoken, broad shoulders relaxed and stunning blue eyes meeting his own. He’d spoken with a casual air, tone confident even though Eddie assumed it was meant to be a joke. He couldn’t stop himself from replaying that moment over and over, his pulse matching the frantic pace it had taken after Buck’s little comment. 

_ It was a joke. It didn’t mean anything.  _

If he didn’t talk himself out of this he’d never get to work on time. Eddie ran his hands over his face again before letting them rest on the steering wheel, eyes blinking against the glaring sunlight. Buck hadn’t been flirting with him, the comment had been a very Buck thing to say and Eddie was just being weird. Against his better judgment Eddie’s mind began to entertain the thought of  _ what if -  _ Buck’s smile growing softer and his eyes shimmering with something more than just that special connection between best friends.  _ What if  _ he’d slipped a hand into Eddie’s hair and -

Eddie started the car and practically punched the stereo button, a popular pop song filtering through the speakers. His knuckles were white against the black leather of the steering wheel, but the dull ache of his tight grip barely registered. Luckily he’d left the AC on when he’d turned off the engine, cool artificial air washing over his ridiculously warm cheeks. It took him another five minutes of slow, controlled breaths before he put the car in gear and pulled into the street. 

By the time he reached the station his flushed cheeks had returned to their usual shade, heart keeping a steady, healthy pace even when he took the stairs two at a time. The rest of the 118 were already settled in various areas of the kitchen and dining room - Bobby in the kitchen with his coffee and newspaper, Hen and Chimney on the couch with a game of War between them. Eddie went straight for the last orange resting in the fruit basket opposite Bobby, swiping a small knife from the rack and slicing the fruit easily. He turned to sit at the table, catching both Hen and Chimney eyeing him eagerly, as if he had something interesting to announce. He huffed a small laugh before shrugging.

“What’s so interesting? Never seen a man eat an orange before?”

The pair glanced at each other. Eddie could see a silent conversation unfolding, but about what he had no idea. Chimney spoke first, cards still in hand as he crossed his arms over the back of the couch. “How’s Buck?”

His hand stilled, knife halfway through his third slice. Eddie managed to keep his expression neutral as he answered with “as good as he can be, considering the circumstances.” The circumstances being the guy couldn’t seem to catch a fucking break and probably needed to see a therapist. 

For a moment Hen and Chimney’s faces shifted into something more somber. Eddie heard Bobby set down his paper. The silence only made them more aware of Buck’s absence, but with a cough the tension was broken as Eddie relaxed again in his chair. “He’s taking Christopher to the zoo today. You should’ve seen the look on his face.” 

Eddie couldn’t help but smile at the memory of Chris’ excitement, eyes sparkling as he gazed at Buck with unfiltered adoration - a look that usually befell Eddie or his  _ Abuela.  _ It was no secret that Christopher absolutely loved Buck, and that Buck treated Chris as if he were his own. Eddie had lost count of the times he’d caught Buck and Christopher together, watching a movie, playing with legos or even working on homework - the two completely absorbed with each other as Eddie looked on. His chest felt bound to burst each time he caught those special moments, a calming sense of peace and fullness washing over him as he tuned out the rest of the world to bask in the bond his son and best friend shared. Orange now forgotten, Eddie simply stared at an overlooked boot scuff on the floor, losing himself in his reverie of Buck and Christopher and them being something  _ more -  _ unaware of the soft smile creeping across his lips. 

_ Click! _

Hen couldn’t contain her snort as she held up her phone, camera aimed at Eddie while her finger hovered over the capture button as he blinked rapidly, then proceeded to focus his attention on Hen and Chimney. His features quickly shifted from soft eyes and slightly rosy cheeks to furrowed brows and mouth open in protest - all of which Hen caught with a succession of rapid-fire tapping on the camera in high-definition. 

Eddie huffed a resigned sigh while tilting his head somewhat to the right, followed by a confused curve of his brow. Hen and Chimney almost gawked at how that was such a  _ Buck  _ move. 

“Y’know, that’s technically illegal.”

Bobby had finished his coffee and was standing, one hand slipping into his pocket as his stern gaze flicked to each of their faces. Hen slowly lowered her phone, while Chimney cleared his throat and shuffled the cards in his hand. Eddie eyed Bobby, who’s previous expression had begun to shift into a much softer one complete with a small smile, understanding eyes and a brief yet exasperated shake of his head. A dad-like aura radiated from him and the brief tension evaporated like fog in the sun. Hen turned her attention to her phone as she flicked through the shots she’d taken while Chimney hovered over her shoulder. Bobby took a moment to wash out his mug before setting it on the drying rack, arms crossing as he turned to face Eddie. 

“So he’s actually leaving the apartment?” Bobby sounded hopeful, eyes lined with worry that had lingered ever since the night of the bombing. 

Eddie nodded. “He’s got the whole day mapped out, complete with face painting and a penguin encounter.” A fond smile tugged at his lips again, the memory of Buck’s ridiculously blue eyes warming his cheeks. 

If Bobby noticed, he didn’t act like it. He wore a smile of his own though, eyes crinkling a little at the corners. “It’ll be good for him. If anyone could get him out of that apartment it’s your son.”

Eddie’s eyes widened a little as Bobby’s words echoed in his head and he realized (not for the first time) it was the truth. No matter how shitty Buck was feeling, if Christopher was involved that man would do anything and everything to make him happy. Buck would move mountains for Chris, hell he’d already done that and more during the tsunami - something he  _ still _ blamed himself for (which was  _ ridiculous  _ because last time he checked Buck wasn't Aquaman). 

The shriek of the alarm cut off any response Eddie was about to give, the half-eaten orange dumped into the trash can. Hen and Chimney were already grabbing their gear with Bobby and Eddie close behind.

“We’ve got a multi-car collision at Graham and 43rd. One vehicle jumped the curb and slammed into a coffee shop, the other two are in the intersection. LAPD is concerned about the family who hit the shop.”

Eddie’s stomach clenched uncomfortably, and from the looks of it everyone else was feeling it too. Accidents involving families were always hard, and as a father seeing any child injured or in danger always made it so much worse. It didn’t help that his brain occasionally felt the need to insert Christopher into the situation. He bit his tongue to shake off the anxiety, muscles tensing as they approached the scene and he slipped into autopilot. 

—

“Alright kiddo let’s buckle you up.”

Chris wiggled his legs while Buck secured his precious cargo, double checking the strap and tugging on the buckle to make sure it was locked. 

“You got your bag?” Chris patted the bag to his right. “You want your juice for the drive?” Chris’ face turned adorably pensive, eyebrows furrowed in a way that reminded Buck of Eddie. His stomach did a little flip, mind trailing to more Eddie-related thoughts that were abruptly cut off when a small hand patted his cheek. 

He blinked, eyes focusing on Chris, his hand still on Buck’s cheek. “You ok Bucky?”

Buck’s ears burned as he cleared his throat. “Uh- um y-yeah I’m good buddy.” He flashed a big smile for reassurance. “Just daydreaming.” 

Because Chris was perfect and incredibly intuitive (or maybe because he’s only 8) he didn’t ask anymore questions, simply smiling and reaching for the juice box in his lap. Buck must have missed his response about the juice because he’d already pulled out the little carton and impaled the straw into it. 

He really needed to stop zoning out.

He refrained from checking the seat belt again and carefully closed the door before jogging to the drivers side. It was only 9 am but the Los Angeles heat was already simmering at 81° and climbing, so he made sure to crank up the AC once he buckled up. He tossed a little smile at Chris when he turned to look behind as he backed out slowly, soft sipping noises blending with the kid-friendly playlist humming softly in the background. It all felt so beautifully normal, and it only got better as Chris began to sing along to whatever song was plucking along. 

It wasn’t until Buck hit his first red light a block from his apartment that an icy chill shot through his spine and his anxiety slapped him hard across the face. It had been a week since he’d left his apartment like this with Christopher in tow for pancakes and the pier and he suddenly realized how similar this all was to  _ that day.  _ Barring the fact Eddie had barged in using his key (and damn the thought of Eddie with a key to his place still made him blush) and used his (adorable) son to get Buck out of his funk, everything from carrying Chris’ bag to the elevator and then letting him carry it himself to the car, to now - as he waits for the light to change - was the same. He focuses on it, knuckles turning white as he practically chokes the steering wheel. He blinks and tries to take in a slow breath and panics when it hitches, heart pounding loud in his ears while he forces a shaky exhale. 

_ Breathe Buckley. Have to breathe. _

He counts like Eddie showed him, and thankfully he’s aware enough to acknowledge the light turning green. He’s lucky he doesn’t slam his foot down on the gas and he’s a little surprised at how calmly he drives forward. But his chest is still too tight and distantly he notes how much his hands hurt and he tries to loosen his grip. For a moment he feels a familiar yellow striped shirt beneath his fingers, sopping wet but attached to something infinitely more important than anything ever. Buck tightens his grip two-fold and is thankful the traffic is miraculously light. 

_ There’s nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you. _

It’s like a splash of cool water on a hot day, trickling down his shoulders and gently easing the tension in every taut muscle. Eddie’s voice, his eyes and his  _ hand  _ as he spoke those words with such conviction and affection flew to the front of his mind, the feeling of  _ warmth _ from the hug they’d shared earlier chasing away the anxiety. His chest was light again and his hands hurt but he could breathe again and that’s all that mattered. Without the sound of his erratic heartbeat he could hear Chris still singing along, oblivious to the choking panic that had dug into Buck. He checked the rear view mirror to reassure himself that yes, Chris was okay, before exhaling and allowing a small smile. 

Ironically, the next song to play was the happy song from the Minions movie, which also happened to be one of Christopher’s favorites. Chris clapped to the beat while Buck sang along as they sailed through a string of green lights and minimal traffic. The fuzzy warmth in Buck’s chest had returned and any anxious thoughts were kept at bay by Christopher’s laughter as Buck tried his hardest to imitate Pharrell in every lyric whilst bobbing his head and dancing with his shoulders. 

He wished he could film this and send it to Eddie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We love a distressed Eddie trying not to think about his feelings for his bestie. 
> 
> Once again thank you all for reading! Next up is the zoo!! 
> 
> Also for those who might not know, the game Chim and Hen were playing is a card game and it's pretty fun I recommend.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! I'm obsessed with these dorks and their adorable son and only want the best for them. ^-^
> 
> Comments/kudos are always appreciated! <3


End file.
